WWWAAAAAAHHHHHHH

I'm going to go cry now. I just wrote a great post - all heartfelt and raw (cause I'm a pregnant emotional basketcase) and the page refreshed and I hadn't saved it. BOO HOO! I give up for today. sorry.

Yes, I know. Somewhere this probably very wrong. But it's too funny not to share. (and poke at a certain older, wiser, paternal family member!) 

Hilarious!!! 

Having a Flu

I have ranted about the crappy windows in our tiny apartment more times than I can remember. The glass door especially makes it nearly impossible to spend time in the living room when it's as cold as it has been. I've had suggestions made to me that I should seal the entire fireplace and cover the door with cellophane (which I have before) and to replace the door entirely. However we rent, so only temporary fixes are available to us and the landlord has done as much as he's going to do I think.

Well, I've checked the flu a hundred times and I could swear every time it was closed. I decided last night after a rant about how we couldn't spend another winter here, I would just flip the flu switch just to see what happened. Guess what? yes, I'm an idiot. the livingroom was miraculously warmer this morning.

I don't need any I told you so's. I can already hear them on replay in my head.

Evil Cherry Garcia

Many of you know that I quit eating dairy about 16 months ago. Ali was having digestive problems and so I had some allergy testing done and it determined that one of my main allergies (or sensitivities) was to dairy, meaning that Ali was also most likely allergic to the same foods. So I cut out dairy (and eggs. SOB).

I was really really religious about it when she was small and when she turned a year I started experimenting a little bit. But since she's still nursing, she's still sensitive. She eats more food than breastmilk these days (thank god) so I indulge a little every now and then. I don't drink milk, but I have a piece of pizza on occasion or add some cheese or sour cream to my tacos. Although, I've been REALLY good lately. I've noticed I haven't felt very good and Ali hasn't been pooping as much. (I know. More than you wanted to know) So I stopped having butter on my toast, and bought soy milk for my cereal. But sometimes I overdo it. Like tonight.

Joe called me on his way home from work tonight and asked me if I wanted anything from Fred Meyer. I felt so sick tonight that I didn't know what I wanted, but I figured I needed something just to medicate. I told him soy ice cream. But then a few minutes later I realized that that just wouldn't do it. So I called him back and said "Get me the REEEAAALLL stuff!" We decided that Cherry Garcia would fit the bill.

Now, I've always liked ice cream, but unlike some friends and family I don't pack away and entire pint in one sitting. I can stretch a ben and jerry's carton for a very very long time. It will even go bad on me. At least from what I can remember from the days when I ate ice cream. so so sad. Well, tonight was an exception. I sat down on the couch, spoon in hand and started taking my dainty bites, thinking that within about five minutes I would need to get up and put the carton away so that I didn't melt what I didn't eat. Twenty minutes later I had continued to eat until the entire pint was gone!

yep, I feel pretty damn sick right now. :)

QUEEN OF ALL ZUMA

I am declaring to all who will listen that I am officially done with Zuma. I promise! I have been beating it consistently for the past couple of months, but felt that there must have been something else to beat - it was too easy. Then frequent poster valerie sent me this link.

So of course, I had to beat that score. Which I did! I don't have a screen shot, but I JUST finished with a final score of 1,334,170! I kick ass!

Back to School

I just got home from my Normal Nutrition class. Nutrition? you say. Yes, nutrition. The science that researches what we put in our bodies. Probably not the best thing given what I've eaten today. I will feel great guilt in just a moment when I list out what I've ingested today for myself and my growing junior.

Oatmeal (not a bad start!)
PB&J sandwich (now, that's not great but it's better than most. I use organic yummy PB and a Jelly that is sweetened with fruit juice)
Burger King Whopper
Burger King Onion Rings
Coke (Ack, I'm dying as we speak and my child has stopped growing from the caffeine)
THEN...I forgot that I wasn't going to make dinner, so I had to throw something in my purse to eat during class.
MORE PB&J!!! (2 more)

So I'm about to go clean the kitchen and make myself a salad with some decent ingredients on it. And I HAVE been taking my vitamins, so I'm not killing myself quickly. It's a very slow and painful fast food death.

Tomorrow I will explore the depths of insanity which is my Statistics teacher Heinz Noonan.
"I only know one man who had the ability to walk a person through a statistical data and the mathematics used to obtain the results without completely confusing the person and making them cry like a second runner in a Ms. America pagent. If you ever find yourself having to take Applied Statistics (AS300) at the University of Alaska Anchorage, fight your way into Hienz Noonan's class. That man is a well dressed genius, yet plain spoken and writes with nothing less than a Mont Blanc." - Ken

In my pjs...and I didn't work out.

I told myself that I would work out. I promised Liane that I wouldn't wuss out and quit working out with her in the mornings. I officially give up on this morning crap though. I know I have it in me to work out and it's getting easier, but this morning at 5:14 (1 minute before the alarm would have screamed in my face) I declared to Joe and Ali that I wasn't going anywhere. Two hours of my life, where I desperately need sleep, will belong to my bed. I haven't told Liane yet, and I'm sure she'll be okay with it, but I'm sad. I usually don't have too much of a problem with a little sleep deprivation and early morning workouts, but this is just too much. I already don't have any energy. sigh...oh well.

I took the night off!

Ali stayed with her grandparents last night and I got some much needed rest. Although it'sn ot like I feel renewed or anything. I pretty much still feel tired and barfy. And I am a "disgusting woman" according to my husband.

I don't take it personally and he adores me so no one should be mad. I just fart for emphasis when he says I'm disgusting. I would probably be grossed out too if I had just spent a nice evening out with my wife and all she could do was eat things that I don't like, giving her icky breath, then burping and farting to her hearts content. Then, just to cap it all off - cuddling up to her and finding that she didn't put on deoderant. mmm mmm...that's a sexy image right there.

And really it's his fault that I'm so gross - he's the one that knocked me up!

FFFBBBBBTTTTTTTT.....

I just wanted everyone to know that I could outfart any man up for the challenge at this moment. In fact every night this past week would have been fine.

whineeeee

I feel like everythign that comes out of my mouth is a big fat whine! ugh! You would think that after weeks of feeling bad you would just get used to it and it would become normal everyday life. No whining required! However I feel like everyday is a little worse than the day before. I'm a terrible sick person.

My poor husband has to deal with my whiney-ness then my bitchiness all in the same minute! I feel so bad but I feel like I can't do anything else other than that.

I also haven't been to the gym either, and there are all these women on the www.babycenter.com bulletin boards that say they feel better when they exercise. I just don't know if I buy it because just walking around the grocery store makes me dizzy. But I'm thinking about trying it. We'll see.

I also just had the weirdest dream. Our house was a disaster (ok...that wasn't a dream) and I got up and there were little baby spiders everywhere. Like they had hatched in Ali's toys and they were spreading thoughout the living room and I couldn't get to them because of all the stuff on the floor and the vacuum quit working right then....(shiver) needless to say, I was freaked. Ali was walking around barefoot through her toys and the spiders. ugh. gross. I'm having a hard time not picking up my feet right now. ok..I admit. I just did pick them up off the floor.

Here's Joe Junior. he was 2.9 mm two days ago. Isn't he cute? 

Isn't she so stinking cute? 

Amber, Joe, James, Ann, David, Judy and Alison 

This morning around 8 AM. aaawwwwww 

Thump thump thump thump

That's what my babies heartbeat sounded like yesterday when we had an ultrasound. Very reassuring. I started to spot and kind of freaked out. It's hard not to freak out when you've experienced two miscarriages. Although I didn't feel nearly this crappy with either one! Which, of course, is a great thing.

My goal was to eat right and exercise through my entire pregnancy. I still aspire to do my best, however I broke down and bought myself pop tarts and lots of bread to keep my stomach at ease. I will not feel guilty! I also haven't been to the gym since Liane left town for the holidays. But I'm planning on going tomorrow. I have to go, or I'll get fat! and I don't want to be fat! Duh.

It's funny how your interpretation of sick can be so different from that of someone else. I've heard stories online and from friends of morning sickness that can keep a girl puking every few hours. I have yet to puke, but I don't think that means I feel much better. I'm so nauseous most of the time that I wish I would puke just to see if it would make me feel better. I'm sure puking is much worse, but then again how do you know unless you're the person doing it?

BBBAAARRRRRFFFFF!!!

Well, I have yet to actually hurl, but I'm just keeping a close eye on all bathrooms, becuase it's coming. I know I wasn't this sick when I was pregnant with ali. I only made two trip to the bathroom and I actually tried to make myself throw up with one of them because I thought I might pass out otherwise, and I couldn't.

I was nervous about this pregnancy at first for so many reasons. At first it was a shock, even though we'd been trying. We hadn't really felt any pressure because I've only been taking things to make me fertile for a month, but I guess they worked! Then there was the lack of sore boobies. I thought for sure that my boobs had to be sore for me to be pregnant, which is probably why I feel so darn sick now. My body has decided to overcompensate for the lack of all symptoms. Oh, yay.

The only thing that seemed to make me feel better yesterday were the yummy mini eclairs at my mother in law's house. My husband swears I ate the entire two boxes, even though I didn't. And if you think about the size of a normal eclair and how many of those little ones add up to one normal one, then I probably only ate two or two and a half normal eclairs. Anyway, I wasn't nauseous for a full two hours. It was bliss.

The only reason I'm able to write my blog right now is because I woke up this morning thinking that was the moment to bow in the bathroom, so I sneaked out of the room and had some toast and water. Things seem to be a little itty bit more comfortably now, I don't trust it!