I want to empower women

Everyone learns from themselves, but they begin by learning from others. They learn from the failures and successes of other people. So why couldn't learn from me? Not that I have any secret knowledge, but maybe I could convince other women that they contain that secret knowledge themselves? I'm a mess most of the time, but I think that my "mess" has created a place of learning that could benefit more than just myself and my family.

I was at my friend's house last night for a Pampered Chef party and in talking with other women about pregnancy and birth and children I realized just how interested I was in everyone's experience. Not to just compare it to my own but to see how each woman viewed the entire experience. I want to hear every detail about the pregnancy, the birth and the infant. I find it to be the most fascinating subject I've ever talked about. But I think my fascination goes beyond birth.

I'm starting to understand how birth relates to everything in the life of a woman. Not that pregnancy is required by women, but that by the mere fact that we can conceive a new life makes a woman's body so much more complicated and that much more beautiful.

If a woman can harbor an entire separate being in her body to take care of, should she not take the best care of that body that she can? I know that I did not when I was pregnant. My baby is perfectly healthy and I'm sure she will be just fine, but I know with my next child I will be much more interested in what goes into my body.

I believe that emotional, mental and physical health encompass each other. So I attempt to heal all parts, but I have never been on-board the eating right train. I attached eating with weight. Period. but I've noticed direct improvements in my energy level and the emotional roller coaster I tend to ride (although I'm always hoping it's just a merry go round). So of course I want to tell the world about how much better they could be feeling, but first they have to realize they don't feel good. And realize that those don't feel good attachements aren't as important as they think.

What does it mean to be "neurotic"?

The definition being:

neu·ro·sis (n-rss, ny-)
n. pl. neu·ro·ses (-sz)

Any of various mental or emotional disorders involving symptoms such as insecurity, anxiety, depression, and irrational fears.
Tension or irritability of the nervous system; nervousness.

When do you cross the line from being a worry-wart or emotional to being neurotic? And when is it unhealthy to be worried? Well, being worried is probably unhealthy from a physical standpoint, but that's not the true point of this discussion is it?

This will be probably the third job I've had where I'm not sure if I'm the real problem? Could I really be that incompetent? I can't be. But when do I start to get concerned that I am? (this is the neurotic part) How can I have been hired three times (or more) by the same people? I swear they are all the same. At this point I have to start to realize that it must be me. Not all bosses are the same way, yet I seem to find them. Inconsistent micromanagers.

I hear people complain all the time about micromanaging, but when is it really a bad thing? I suppose if you wanted to take credit and responsibility for your job you might care, but I don't. So I don't mind getting bossed around. However, half of the time I get told to do what I want, but it never works out. What I do, she doesn't like, so I get to change it again. So why do it? so annoying.

Now I'm just bitching. This really is a practice in standing my ground. I am not incompetent or stupid. I am unorganized and forgettful (at times). But I strive to not be those things. I feel that just because your organization is different from someone elses does not make it wrong or bad. Maybe when you work for a single person in their own business though it does matter. What do you think?

The Baby Steps and what about Pus?

It's all downhill from here. Walking, then talking, then sex. We're screwed. She officially took her first steps yesterday and has taken a couple more today.

She is having a really fun day of teething. Really it's been a fun week. She acts tired, but just won't go to sleep. She fusses and fusses when you try to lay her down. But if you just let her get up and play she's fine. So the past three nights I've been laying down with her for over an hour trying to keep her fairly restrained and calm. Like trying to hold a bag of cats. No fun. This afternoon we had the same thing. She was rubbing her eyes over and over again. It took an hour of trying to get her to take a nap before she started screaming. I couldn't figure out what to do. She wouldn't nurse, take her binky, sit on the floor, play. I finally pinned her down (because she hates it when I stick my fingers in her mouth) and got out the orajel. She fell asleep about two minutes after that (while she nursed - so now I have a numb nipple). Amazing.

We're going camping this weekend - so more camping picture fun to come! We're going to our home away from home, Tolsona. They have hot hot showers. Yeah...we don't rough it so well.

I'm starting to learn about Macrobiotics. I never thought in a million years that I would be interested in such a vegetable based diet, but it's so unbelievably healthy for you. and the meals that I've had have all been good, diverse, interesting and very filling. I also feel amazing afterwards. I've had crappy food in the last twelve hours, and I can tell the difference.

Of course, the second I told Joe that I found it to be interesting and possible in our house he rolled his eyes. So I told him that I wouldn't talk about it again. I'm just going to start changing my diet slowly and he'll have to come along since I'm the one that cooks. I also refuse to have a chicken nugget/french fry kid. Those are treats, not meals. The more I learn about natural foods and health the more repulsed I am by the cultural "norms" that people ingest on a daily basis. Of course, it tastes good, but do you really understand what's in it and what it does to you?

For instance - this is my favorite thing to tell people lately. In the book "Mother-Daughter Wisdom" by Christiane Northrup she talks about the problems with dairy. Especially with your un-organic store bought dairy. A normal cow produces about 10 Lbs of milk per day. In American dairy farms, with hormone treatment, they produce 100 Lbs of milk per day. This causes their udders to become engorged, which creates scabs from over milking, dragging on the ground, and infections from the strain (any woman that's ever breastfed can feel the pain). In order to fight these infections they must be pumped full of antibiotics, which increases the white blood cell count to fight the infections. Do you know what the everyday term for White Blood Cells is? drumroll please............PUS! The FDA allows 1 - 1.5 parts per million of pus into your milk. but don't forget the hormones (estrogen being a huge one, which contributes to all sorts of health issues in women) and antibiotics. I'm not saying stop drinking milk, I'm saying start drinking organic. No hormones, no antibiotics, just milk. Or switch to soy. It's not perfect for you, but it's better than dairy on your digestive system anyway. :)